Does a Dominatrix Have To Scream?

A lot of my slaves and I have had random chats about BDSM. As I'm only 22, I love hearing about the scene and the history in Australia. Many of my slaves have been in the scene for many many decades ( that is much longer than what I have been alive). 

The other day I met a new slave and we were talking about the aura of different Dominatrixes. When I talk about aura - I mean the way in which they carry themself - the way they speak and interact with slaves. 

This slave was telling me how some Dominatrixes he has scene never smile or even spoken to the slave.  They only screamed instruction like "walk three steps forward". I was shocked. 

Fascinatingly, I hear the exact same thing from so many slaves. 

Look, there is nothing wrong with embodying this very traditional way of exerting dominance - however it just feels so superficial to me. Personally, it would feel so unnatural to never have a conversation with a slave. Especially if I have known them for a long time. 

When I first started domming, I felt a bit awkward to be honest so I wouldn't ever talk to my slaves and would just order them around. I wouldn't give them a chance to speak as I felt that was how I imagined a dom-slave dynamic should work. Although it may be like that in BDSM online videos and pornography, in real life, a slave-dominatrix relationship is more organic. 

Yes, there is a time and place for getting into the headspace of a scene - but it's also fun to hear people's stories. I also feel like having that closeness allows me to tailor the session to what they would like to explore. 

Now, although I am always in control and a dominant woman - I don't think that you need to shout or scream the whole session in order to assert dominance. I do love to dish out verbal abuse at the top of my lungs but that doesn't work for every slave or scene. 

The thing is that there is more to dominance than yelling. Much more. 

Domination is a feeling. It is a mindset. It is in your bones. 

It sounds corny but it comes from within you. If you have done horse-riding, you would know that horses can sense if you are nervous. If you are nervous, they may buck, bolt or pigroot to scare you and assert their dominance - however, if you have self-confidence then they will not mess with you. A horse can tell within 5 seconds whether you are someone to be messed with or not. When I was a little girl I used to yell at my horse when he disobeyed me. He would put my life in danger by bucking or bolting. It was terrifying and I would be so livid. I would feel so helpless and yell at him! I thought that if I yelled at him, he would never do it again. I was so wrong about that

When I yelled at the horse, he felt smug and victorious as he knew that he had won the power struggle as he had annoyed my enough to make me feel enraged. A real cowboy gets their horse to follow their lead without screaming or doing a tantrum. The horse knows that a real cowboy cannot be crossed. 

Slaves are a lot like horses. You don't need to scream at the top of your lungs to assert your dominance when dealing with a slave. A slave can tell if you genuinely feel in control. And at the end of the day, the slave has a low of power because they can stop the scene whenever they like.

Being able to lead is something that every woman should learn - even if she is not a dominatrix.

I'm an enigma. Although I will greet you with a smile as you come into the dungeon - but once I have you restrained you will see my dark side. I will make sure you are pushed to your limits. 

And if you make a mistake in my dungeon, I will make sure you never make the same mistake ever again.